Thursday, March 12, 2009

May I Have Your Attention Please:

To the lady next to me in Walmart today:


Your son is screaming and holding up his arms for you to pick him up. Quit griping at him and pick him up. Hug him for a minute. Talk calmly to him. Love him. Pick him up! Stop acting like a twit and take two minutes to calm your son down. Quit telling him that everyone is staring at him because he's yelling. It isn't helping, and frankly everyone is staring because you're being mean to him.


To the man in front of me at Walmart today:


I know you only have one item. Put it on the conveyor belt. Do not stand there and hold it. When you stand there and hold it, and I put my items on the conveyor belt behind you, my items scoot to the front of the line. Put it on the conveyor belt. The cashier does not know that the next items on the conveyor belt are not yours. Yes, she will start scanning my items before yours because she does not know that these are not your items. Griping at her will not make this process go any faster.


To everyone around me at Walmart today:


Yes, that is my son who just picked up a miniature battery powered fan, turned it on, and stuck it in his sister's hair. Yes, she is screaming because her hair is tightly wound up in it and I am trying to get her hair out of it quickly or I am going to have to purchase this fan and a pair of scissors. Stop looking at me. Mind your own business.

2 comments:

  1. Don't you just love going to Wal-Mart. I think all Wal-Mart's are universally annoying.

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  2. Sorry that I am missisng all the action... :0)
    Hilarious. GG

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